And That’s Gon’ Make Me Dance: Redirecting the Motivation for Pole Dancing

By now, you’ve heard of the “Christian Pole Dancing” story being circulated all over the Internet. Apparently, an owner of a dance studio in Houston is offering pole dance classes to women only the second Sunday of every month. The purpose is to help women to appreciate their God-given bodies. What better way to do that than to do tricks on the pole to Christian Rock songs? Items required for admission: comfortable clothing, sexy heels….and a church program. Check it out here via NewsOne.

I’m not questioning her motivation or methods–well, maybe a little. At the least though, I was most happy to know that my original thought that the pole dancing  “sister” was  African-American was wrong. When I read the headline on Twitter, I immediately had visions of a group of women dancing to gospel songs like Mary Mary’s “God in Me” (You know it goes hard in and outside the church!) or the bounce version of God Property’s “Stomp” (Yes, I’m guilty of nodding to in the club in college). You can’t imagine the relief I felt when I saw otherwise.

In the meantime, if we’re going to pole dance, let’s swing to more appropriate music, yes? I’ve been to some classes and after my first, I gained a newfound respect for strippers. You have to be in shape, and it takes skill!! I think it’s safe to say that strip clubs make or break songs, especially those from artists from the South, and there’s no shortage of “strip club anthems” lately. If you have a choice of what songs to pole dance to, please, don’t choose Fred Hammond, choose these:

I’m missing a ton of songs. I imagine that a few of those aren’t been played at the “shake,” but I don’t “frequent the booty clubs,” as Big Boi would say, and perhaps my mind just isn’t in “strip club” mode right now. On top of that, the radio plays enough strip club songs that I don’t need to go. What’d I miss? Better yet, what do you think about pole dancing for Jesus?

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4 thoughts on “And That’s Gon’ Make Me Dance: Redirecting the Motivation for Pole Dancing

  1. This article had me laughing… I hadn’t heard of the Sunday Pole Dancing class (maybe luck)… I guess there is a market for ANY and EVERYTHING… Good article! Good read!

  2. You are hilarious. The title alone had me rolling. Pole dancing is so inherently erotic that I don’t think you can appropriate it for Jesus.

    And my favorite booty song is Back That Thing Up.

  3. I hadn’t heard about this and now that I have it’s ridiculously funny! I would honestly like to know what church ladies would be interested in taking Christian Pole Dancing Classes? Would this be a part of the Women’s Ministry? Would they go as a group? Would they give a report back to the church on this event? Would pastor have to approve it? Would the 1st lady participate?? WHEW too funny!

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