No New Friends? – Clutch Magazine

So, though I understand the logical side, I wonder if we’re shortchanging ourselves when we practice this “no new friends” mantra. What if you don’t live in the same place as your friends? What happens when you outgrow your bestie (it can happen) or there’s an irreparable rift in a friendship? Do you just shut your life down?


xoJANE: What I Learned From Lurking Online Dating Sites: Men Are Bitter, Too

What I Learned From Lurking Online Dating Sites: Men Are Bitter, Too

Before he listed his hobbies, interests and dating style like the profile prompter suggested, he made sure to give lurkers seven lengthy paragraphs about what he doesn’t like about women first.

EBONY MAG: 6 People to Avoid on Social Media

EBONY MAG: 6 People to Avoid on Social Media

“Selection in who becomes a part of your social media home is so important. It’s like picking someone for a team sport or work group. You’ll be stuck with these folks for a good little while, so let’s hope what they bring to the table is sufficient—and not horribly annoying.”

CLUTCH MAGAZINE: How Important Is Your Partner’s Support of Your Passion in a Relationship?

How Important Is Your Partner’s Support of Your Passion in a Relationship?

Can you deal with your honey not caring about what makes your heart sing (provided you know what that thing is)? I’m not talking about that job you’re on the brink of quitting every other day, a shoe collection or your soft obsession with a celebrity, but that thing that you could do every day for free if you had the chance.

If you are a pastry chef or baker, when someone asks your boo what you do, would you feel comfortable if he/she said, “She makes cookies and shit”? If you’re an artist, would dating someone who doesn’t care about your pieces or attend your art exhibits fly with you?

Read more at Clutch.

Clutch Magazine: Beyonce Never Has on Clothes When She Performs…So What?


Check me out on Clutch today where I discuss people having their panties in a bunch over Bey’s Super Bowl costume.

Call me surface level, but I’ve never once given Bey’s attire a second thought. Perhaps, like so many others, she sprinkled her Creole dust on me, making me desensitized to the lack of fabric on her body as she sashayed across the stage. She’s been popping her parts in leotards, ice skater skirts, and glittered mesh for over 10 years, so it’s not a big deal to me.

Read more here

Media and Black Women: Who Will You Believe?

As I sat and watched (and cursed at) the train wreck that is Basketball Wives last night, I cringed atleast a million times within the hour. The end scene where Evelyn and Royce fight at the swanky restaurant pushed me over the edge. I’ll be honest and say for a brief moment, I condoned violence among women, hoping Royce would’ve gotten atleast one more jab at Evelyn. Beyond that, I couldn’t believe that they conducted themselves that way in public (I’m lying to myself), calling each other “hoes” and “bum ass bitches.”

It quickly reminded me of an essay I wrote a recently about how black women shouldn’t believe everything we hear, read or in this case, see about ourselves. I used a couple of examples of black women being thrown under the bus, and for the life of me, I can’t believe I failed to mention media’s portrayal of  us and our relationships with other women. From just the first half of one episode of Basketball Wives, or any other reality show, we’re put on display to be bitter, malicious, messy and classless. We aren’t all that.  For consolation, I have to put on my Naive Hat and believe that women cannot act this immaturely in real life. It’s just a show; it’s just for a check. Right? Please tell me I’m right.

Ironically, my essay, The Milk’s Gone Bad: Don’t Believe Everything You Hear or Read was published on last week, but I just saw it yesterday. Read it and let me know what you think.