“I wouldn’t buy nothin’ BUT sammiches!” ~ Bruh Man, Martin
In case you missed it, we’re still talking about sandwiches…. 300 sandwiches to be exact. The New York Post published, “’I’m 124 Sandwiches From An Engagement Ring.’” Page Six senior reporter, Stephanie Smith, has created 300Sandwiches.com to chronicle her quest to marry her boyfriend. To him, her sandwiches equal love that deli’s just can’t provide. Needless to say, folks are talking.
From her About Me section of her website:
“My boyfriend E is obsessed with two things: Star Wars and sandwiches. During a Sunday lunchtime viewing of “Return of the Jedi” he told me: “you are 300 sandwiches away from an engagement ring!” … And so, I got cooking …”
There are a ton of things I could examine if I really had the time. Her eager beaver attitude towards his carrot dangling of an engagement ring based on sandwiches. The fact that she naively reveals things about her relationship that even a fool would know to keep disclosed or his dismissal of her effort. Maybe the idea that him suggesting she make him sandwiches in exchange for nuptials was a cute joke and compliment to her, uh, sandwich-making skills, rather than something to be taken seriously. Or that she actually did the math on how many sandwiches she needed to make and how often to secure an engagement, a wedding and children before her eggs turn to dust.
Nah. I don’t even want to touch that.
Instead, let’s talk about how smart this woman is. She’s a marketing genius! In a time when doing anything can gain media attention and set up you for life, Ms. Smith figured out the perfect way to not only maybe marry her ridiculous boyfriend, but also become notably famous in the process. Get people talking, whether good or bad, and have a product to show.
“Oooh, I know what I’m gonna do. He wants sandwiches? I’ll fix him three a week for 12 months, and voila! Marriage, here I come!” That’s awesome, but is creating a website, blogging and photographing your journey necessary? Nope. Creative, yes, but not necessary.
Admit it, girl. You want the limelight. The action. The Sandwich Spotlight, and I’ll be damned if you’re not getting it. She’s already professionally connected to the industry, and the Post story notes that she’s already grabbed the attention of culinary greats (and stars) like Emeril Lagasse. As I write this, folks are either killing themselves over her archaic moves on the cutting board or applauding her for doing whatever it takes to keep her man happy. In any case, they’re visiting her website, increasing her traffic. Hell, even I’ve emailed several recipes to myself (Yes, I’m a sandwich connoisseur).
And that, she can take to a television producer, editor or booking agent, then to the bank.
So, listen, while I hope they do tie the knot, if it doesn’t happen, she’ll have a nice side-gig to hang her hat on for consolation. I’m still baffled, amazed even, but I’m not mad at her sandwich-making self! Make that money, if that’s the real end result. And you, stop judging this woman’s methods and get into these recipes!
Finally, if marriage is indeed, her goal, I suggest she find Bruh Man from Martin. She wouldn’t have to make half of 300 sammiches to get that ring. Godspeed!
Because I Said So 